"Bold and Brassy" - An autobiographical account of the doings of Count Basil De Brass, gentleman adventurer, as related by him to the brain in the jar, by means of his superior mental powers…
Anyone who knows me will tell you that I ain't much of a one for woolly headed maundering on matters philosophical.
A stiff upper lip, and a bit of pluck will see you through most things, matters philosophical included, in my experience.
So when I awoke to find myself in the depths of a wizards laboratory, with a demon imprisoned inside me and scratching restlessly at the borders of my mind, I was not greatly troubled. As time goes by and I remember more about my past, well lets just say, certain sensations and situations become more familiar.
Of course, the ladies were a bit put out by all this, bless them! Pluck to the backbone, the both of them, but a bit twitchy when dealing with the darker arts.
Apparently there was a bit of a to do beforehand involving the summoning, and the binding, and the morality of experimenting on an unconscious and unconsenting brass automaton. But Pandexter had his way in the end.
Which is not surprising, as this Pandexter cove is a very downy sort of a fellow. In fact one of the downiest I have met, and that is saying something considerable.
It was also no surprise to me to find out that he had tried to steal me from my proper owner, Pandora.
Wizards and the like have always wanted to add me to their collections and Pandexter is no different. Apparently, I am an "extremely well made and appealing object, desirable as both a companion and a curio" or some such nonsense. So he decided to be a bit of a scallywag and acquire me, making up some face saving excuse about an experiment, after Pandora bought him to book over the matter.
Nothing more a gentleman could do under the circumstances of course, caught out as he was, stealing from a lady. Scallywag he may be, but it stands to reason that no true gentleman wishes to upset a lady of Pandora's consequence. Nor Talis neither, for that matter!
In order to help with his "experiment", Pandexter has asked me to keep a detailed log of "things that happen" and "how I feel", which is what I am doing here. Given that I am no sort of damned scholar, I am getting the brain in the jar to write this for me.
Of course "how I feel" is none of his damned business, and it's not something one gentleman should ever ask about any other. But Pandexter, for all his faults, most definitely IS a gentleman, so it is probably important to his "experiment" thing that I try to answer, despite the fact that one can't help but feel gauche doing so. So here is my answer:
"I, Count Basil de Brass, feel now as I always do. Properly damned calm, properly damned amused and properly damned assured. Any other state of mind would be frankly, inconceivable, not to mention inconvenient. Not sure why this is so damned important, but there is no reasoning with Wizards. Best not to try in my experience."
And that is all.
I have to assume that the demon currently imprisoned inside me will become more and more difficult to control as time goes by. A lesser mind might be daunted, but bah! I disregard this threat!
Demons have quailed before my sword in the past and this one will be no different. I am the very devil myself when my blood is up, (not that I have much in the way of blood you understand) as this demony fellow will learn to his cost should circumstances arise in that way!
I give fair warning... Don't cross me Demon!
Right now the ladies and I are stuck in some sort of "pockety dimension" place, which makes no sort of sense to me as I can't see no pockets anywhere. Not that pockets would make sense either under the circumstances, as they would quite spoil the cut of what I am currently wearing, and of course ladies attire should NEVER include pockets. Not to be considered!
Be that as it may, (and things generally ARE as they may), we are going to fall out of the pocket place sometime soon and continue on our quest to rescue the lady demon that Talis worships, from the evil man demon that she does not. This is of course, an extremely noble and heroic quest, involving the honour of a lady (in fact probably several), and so justifies any efforts on our behalf to bring it to a swift and successful conclusion.
If not in this century, and with this lady demon, then definitely in some other century with some other lady demon.
I have the honour to be your Most Obedient Servant
Basil De Brass
(Count, Manikin, and Gentleman Adventurer)